Feel like my old self right now. I don't really have anything to say, I just heard this song last night while working and I thought to myslef, "SELF! That song was a banger, you should put it in a blog!" So here it is!

I do have the usual thoughts. Fear of failure, fear of success (AS IF, AMIRGHT!?). Fear of burnout, fear of opening the damned project and throwing ourselves against the wall for the thousandth time knowing we will be no closer to the finished end product.

But that's not true darn it!

Game is better now in this moment than it's ever been, and though we're not sure it's as good as we hope it to be, the only way we'll ever know is to keep pushing. We're getting closer every single day.

Wish I could say a solid push today will lead to being close to being done with the demo, but there's so much left to do. I'm going to bite the bullet and tune up waveswimming today. I keep accidently waveswimming and it could just feel better overall so I want to do a pass on it.

The thing about working on a complex system like this though, is you gotta poke around it and relearn how it works and it's little kinks and it comes with a lot of opening of old wounds you were trying to leave behind. Any game project is a mountain of work arounds and clever tricks to kinda realize your current vision of a system, and if you come in wanting to change it and improve it in any meaningful way, you ahve to accept that there are going to be painful guttings and reformings made.

And it wasn't my idea when I started this blog, but that's kind how it feels like where we are as a people. We know there is something wrong, we know systems are broken and we gotta go under the knife and try to sort some things internal to our society because the way things are going isn't very great.

And everyone is pointing their fingers and decrying the other side as evil and they gotta be stopped and as we all try to say before we get angry and lash out, we're all the fucking same, no one's fuckin' perfect,  get off your damned high horse.

Interesting times for sure. But this is the only place we have any true agency, and power to be truthful. Unless we want to go on twitter and bitch and moan at people and start shit. We've done enough of that!

Time for dev!

I made a kick ass stew today, it's slow cooking cuz it's a cheap chuck steak cut so I gotta cook it till its tender, but Im 'bout to go grab a bowl early, and gear up for work as the newest version of Unity 6 installs.

Hoping by the end of today waveswim is feeling really good, and we have some neat underwater cave areas done up! And if it goes REALLY well maybe we'll even get a bit more progress done on some new items!

Oh, and I may or may not make a new build soon. It's like, the current demo is pretty shit, we have nothing to lose putting up new demos and I think it would be a good idea to just upload a seni finished build to get rid of this notion that the demo has to be groundbreaking, and super fun and we don't have to aspire to some wildly lofty fun demo that stears us away from sitting down and getting to it.

One day at a time!

Edit: BAH! Almost forgot! One thing I wanted to touch on is how I'm getting side tracked with too much shit again. Wondering about which ways the winds are blowing, wondering how engagements are going. Wondering if this or that happens maybe we can catch a break.

THAT IS STOOPID! ALL THAT MATTERS IS WE BUST OUR ASS AND MAKE SEACRIT A GOOD GAME!

IF YOU BUILD IT (AND IT'S NOT DOG SHIT) THEY WILL COME!

May the best gamedevs win.

Heard this song for the first time yesterday and I was laughing my ass off, and also totally blown away by how well sung and catchy it was at the same time. Total banger if a little raunchy. I'm pretty certain there aren't any little kids subjecting themselves to this blog, so fuck it, enjoy another banger from Rob Schnieder's ball sack! XD