I blather a lot in these parts trying to piece together why the world has gone to shit, and I really think it boils down to one singular concept.

We're disconnected.

We wake up in the morning to a digital alarm clock. We pour our prepackaged food onto a plate, hit it in a microwave, drink some coffee harvested by workers in some other country. We hop in a vehicle we don't service ourselves, we drive to a building we didn't build, we punch data into software we didn't code, we do  a job others defined for us, we work into a system we didn't design, we submit to power hierarchies we didn't agree to or develop, then we go home and bicker about political topics with points we adopted by online personalities.

We're damned drones pre programmed not to rock the boat or accomplish anything. We're all goofing off, gaming the system, enjoying the fruits of being mindless automatons in service of one another.

We're lazy, we're coddled, we're devoid of ambition, we're many degrees separated from the grit that built everything of value, and we've fallen into this idiot routine of fucking off while the building walls catch fire and fall in. Everyone's an innefectual bystanding sitting there like a dumb fuck thinking, "This is fine."

We no longer develop forward thinking, we no longer develop principle or a can do spirit, or have any sense of will to create or push forward to do great things. Instead we fall over each other to be first in line at the victimhood line.

It's fucking pathetic. We need to grow the fuck up and start doing important shit again, and not acting like children waiting for the world is going to save us. 

News flash: No one is coming to save us.

Anyway, long story short, the world would be a much better place if we just shut down all the restaurants and people had to cook their own god damn food and learn to be fucking competent at something of actual damned tangible value. Let's start there, then maybe we can get rid of dishwashers and deposable dishes. Grow the fuck up, learn how to wash your damned plates like a damned adult.

Thanks for listening to my TED talk, GET OFF MY LAWN

Oh! Aside from hours and hours of boring texture naming and management, I implemented splashes on a whim, and I think they came out KICK ASS. And check it out, A video that isn't just hours of boring ass dev!

Said boring ass dev:

https://youtu.be/f2qLpg-EBJ0?t=22057

I should make a short video clip of showing them in action, I put together so many hours and hours of boring, tedious gamedev and never spend any time to put out little clips of the cool shit... Maybe i'll make a vid in a bit and post it on twitter where ABOLUSTELY NO ONE WILL SEE IT. And then I'll post it here where ABSOLUTELY NO ONE WILL SEE IT.

That reminds me, I despise what passes for marketing these days, it's like a competition to see who can be the most smarmy fuck head. "Hurr durr, isn't this silly guys, Here's a picture of of a wacky bug in mah game! HURRR DURRR don't forget to wishlist friends! LOLOMGWTFBBQ" 

Gaming and gamedev has become so cringe in the past several years. Only way to make a buck is to lick the right people's assholes and play ball with this modern day horse. Petulant tribalism and circle jerking among those who care only about their fake images and their social credits among the in-crowd jokers.

Didn't sleep great so did a bit of meal prep today, it's a good way to get off the damned computer and do something productive.

I've finally gotten the technique for this gluten free naan bread down. It takes a small amount of xanthan gum as a binder, then the trick is to cook it just a little bit on both sides, then you pop it out of the pan and roll it out again, you're able to really flatten it out and make it very tortilla like. 

I'll be honest, they don't taste AMAZING, but I think in the future, i'll cut out the cocunut flour and go full almond flour, and I'm going to say screw it and add just a touch of regular flour and see how much that helps pump up the flavor.

Overall just very happy to have a meat delivery device in this flatbread that now holds its shape well.

Going to get to a little bit of work on the game. I had an epiphany that i've had before that it's time to stop polishing stuff and it's time to start dumping things into the game and seeing what sticks.

We may find that the shop and money system just aren't fun, or we may have a huge revelation about some system that will require a huge revamp. Point is, now is not the time to be polishing, it's time to finally start throwing shit into the game and finding the fun, finding the game loop and building out the key pieces. Once that is done THEN it will be time to go in and polish up the little things.

I get stage fright thinking about actually adding things to make it feel like a game, I worry that once I actually add everything in a way that it's supposed to stand on its own, be a fun game, it won't be and this will all be a failure.

But if we don't ever put this sucker together, failure is enevitable, so it's time to let go of this flotsam and get to sinken' or swimming.

Maybe I'm crazy, but I genuinly think the combat is really coming together, it's only a matter of figuring out the best delivery system for the enemies and finding which progression setups are most fun!

It's funny, I've built up so much stuff. Shops, dropped upgrades, items, there are so many systems that I'm kinda frozen with possibilities.

You know, i'm actually going to prioritize just some nice quiet thinking time. We gotta think about this and have a solid plan of attack so we're confident moving forward and not spinning wheels in mud.

I'm really excited for how everything seems to be coming together. We're far beyond wondering if we can do this or that, these days damn near anything I want to adjust or try we just get it in and it works, all these wasted years are starting to pay off in terms of actual confidence and competency. I usually play the fool in these parts, but I'm genuinly really proud of how everything is shaping up, and i'm really excited for this to hopefully start to come together soon.

Been a while since I expressed this notion, but for so long, we have been working on systems that drag everything else down, that aren't polished that arne't fun, they don't make the whole better. The game has perpetually been as weak as its weakest link. Poor performance, crappy combat systems, weak AI, undeveloped combat loops, a lack of progression.

We are finally reaching the point where this should finally start to coelesce, and the systems will begin to elevate one another and all these years of work will reveal an overarching vision that allows for what I hope is some pretty innovative and compelling play and maybe even a bit of storytelling :)

You know... I wasn't always a cranky old man. It's been  a long hard road, and this mad world with all its mad people can take a toll on you over time. But in a weird way, I'm kinda grateful for it all, because we MIGHT be on the precipice of something awesome coming from all this bullshit. What I would have given for just average day to day nicities and dignity the past several years, but there's a small chance that we get to do something Awesome with SeaCrit. By all metrics and accounts this is goiing to be a miserable failulre and this blog post isn't going to age well.

BUT YOU NEVER KNOW M*THER FUCKERS!

Back to it tomorrow!