Trying not to stress about the out of control madnesses of the world, but the mind wanders.

Things feel broken. And the worst things get, the more you agonize over trying to figure out why everything is crumbling, if you figure it out, maybe you can piece together a plan for survival. But the more you piece the puzzle together, the more obvious it's revealed that your piece just doesn't fit into the crazed contraption others have stitched.

We live in a madhouse. We're medicated, we're waiting for the experts to fix things, we're waiting for our participation trophies and paychecks and eager to get up on our soap boxes to explain why we're the greatest victim so we can get our little cookies.

We need to grow the F*ck up or we're doomed. We need to let go of imagined transgressions, harden up and accept that the world isn't sunshine and rainbows, and it's not going to get better until we stop crying, get up off our ass, suck it up and make it better by rolling up our sleeves. We're going to fail, but we'll try again, and learn the harsh truths of the world in the process as those of the past did.

We need tough love in this world, we need to be smacked in the face with cold reality and realize, HEY, YOU WERE WRONG, IT'S OK, WE"RE ALL WRONG AT FIRST, THAT'S HOW WE GROW. Some of us are only first learning to be adults even in our later years, it's a societal issue, we need to stop babying one another. We're so self servingly kind and weak to one another demanding the same for ourselves as the ship sinks into icy waters. No one has the spine or care to tell one another the harsh truths, maybe we're too far gone.

We've normalized the decay, the weakness, the bitching and moaning so much that we just accept this fake reality we've painted. We've adopted the mantle of this petulant loser who needs everyone else to  baby us harder than everyone else. Everthing has to be given to us. 

We're so far removed from the notion that you have to give in order to take, we look at all the fancy fake nothings riddling our lives and we don't understand that it's all fool's gold, third generational illusions of an empty life. We're all trying to achieve some fake ideal that we knew was fake. We are surrounded by artificial contrivances filtered through the lense of the lowest common denominator. 

Our "smart" phones tell us what to read, what to think, what games to play, what opinions to have. People don't know how to be active consumers are citizens any more. No one engages in culture, in creating better things, in creating a pipeline to betterment or engagement to bring on the next generation so they can understand how anything works. We're spoon fed garbage, grow weak and stupid, then we die.

We've stamped out talent and hard work so hard all anyone worships is flippant, smarmy mediocrity and it's just so god damned sad. I'm reminded of that short story Harrison Bergeron by Kurt Vonnegut more and more these days. We've become enslaved to worshipping mediocrity, and spiteful towards the notion of doing anything great any more. 

This is what happens when generation after generation you hand the keys of the kingdom to increasingly spoiled and self absorbed heirs to madness.

Anyway, just the usual complaints in these parts. Got some decent writing done yesterday, hoping to get a little more done today if I can get out of this funk. 

Why try? The game will never be done. Everyone wants to see everyone else fail like crabs in a bucket. The markets are closed, the pioneering spirit to make cool new stuff is dead. Everyone just looks at one another through a tribalistic lense with no optimism for cool shit that we can be aspire for. No more moon bases, no more curing cancer, no more flying cars. Just blame games and finger f*cking painting, a d*ck measuring contest to see who can be the most self absorbed victim, it's f*cking pathetic.

Bleh, just a neckbeard saying the usual neckbeard things, while the world goes on doing its day to day.

Deep breath, game is coming together. I regret taking this writing rabbit hole, but it's almost all done and we can move on to getting the game done again and that seems to be coming together, at least I think it was. I don't know any more, nothing in this world makes any sense. The more I try to understand it, the more depressing it becomes. Scratch back, turn a blind eye to the corruptions and hypocrisy, be a self centered weasel and tow the line and you can go really far in this cruel world. It's so damned easy, I can understand why everyone making it in the world today looks down on everyone else.

I complain too much. It doesn't reflect well on me or the project and I know I should refrain from submitting this bitching and moaning but there it is. You kinda just become self destructive at some point wondering WTF is even the point of anything after trying so hard year after year.

Let's end on something positive. Sometimes things have to get worse before they can get better, and by that metric, we surely must be getting closer to prosperity!.. 

Right?.. 

Bleh.

It's an interesting time to be working on a silly fish game in a cave.